BEARD THEORY

CONGA LINE CONFIRMATION CONTRACT

A number of years back, longtime friend/current roommate Alan told me he was going to be attending a wedding. The week before it occurred we were discussing how great we thought conga lines were and after a little bit of goading on my part, he promised me that he would try to start one up at the wedding.

The wedding came and went. I saw him afterwards and I asked him about the conga line- did it happen? How was it? Did it snake around the entire room? He said it was a great and successful conga line. Best one ever. Everybody was in it. I quizzed him a bit more and he nonchalantly answered all my questions. To quell my doubts I made him sign a contract. Without any hesitation he quadruple-signed it:

Flash forward several years later: The subject of conga lines randomly came up again in conversation one day and I reminded him of the one he started at the wedding.

"What conga line at what wedding?"

"The one I made you sign that contract for in my green notebook."

I dug out my notebook and showed him the contract. Alan thought about it for a moment,

"Oh, that never happened. There was never any conga line."

--

To be fair, around this same time that he lied about the wedding conga line to me, Alan did in fact attend a columbia film student party in the Lincoln Park neighborhood where he actually DID participate in (and helped create) a wild and frenzied conga line that involved everyone at the party snaking through room after room of the apartment as all good conga lines should do. Alan is a good guy, even if he lies about a conga line now and then.

CO-CEO'S OF THE SEA

EDDIE'S QUESTIONS

MODERN PAGES (FTL)

Some more pages from the modern incarnation of The Funny Things List:

 

 (I've re-glued the binding in this sketchbook several times, so the text along the center spine is difficult to scan. Some of the casualties include: easy mac, the latin invasion of 1999, donnie darko, bullet time, disney's nine old men, and fat camp.)

As always, suggestions are welcome.

POKES

LAST YEAR'S MICE

 

There were about 8 or so total.

TWO PAGES (FTL)

A relatively modern page:

And an ancient one:

- from the evergrowing Funny Things List.

(suggestions are eternally welcome)

THE STOMP POST

Marty taped Russell's hand to the stomp post... and sure enough in due time his hand was stomped outta the picture so to speak. A simple stomping shouldn't signal any shame, but Russell, my old buddy Russell can't sit still when we all start stomping.

THE BABY